I have noted that you describe yourself as being just a "lump of ignorance''. Actually the devotee should always think like that. That the devotee should feel himself so lowly is the teaching of Lord Caitanya. Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu also represented Himself as a very foolish disciple even though He proved Himself as the greatest scholar and was actually Krishna Himself.
Letter to Janaki, 9 December, 1968